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Post by Raven on Apr 25, 2008 15:18:07 GMT -5
Admit it. There are LOTS of redneck jokes out there. Here are a few picture ones.--------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------------------------------------------- ^Eww.
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Post by vampyre on May 21, 2008 17:24:57 GMT -5
My neighbors(NOT) or Before it was a tank top Red neck Bra Couldn't afford the tank top? Propane and propane accessories...aaak!
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Post by debim on May 21, 2008 18:53:49 GMT -5
Hank Hill would frown at the last one.
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Post by Raven on May 21, 2008 19:17:59 GMT -5
Ewwwwwww!
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Post by vampyre on May 21, 2008 21:44:15 GMT -5
Bubba. your burgers tast like sh*t.
I don't know why.
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Post by Raven on Jun 13, 2008 14:11:32 GMT -5
Redneck pick-up lines
1) Did you fart? cuz you blew me away.
2) Are yer parents retarded? cuz ya sure are special.
3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea . I can't hold it in.
4) Do you have a library card? cuz I'd like to sign you out.
5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? cuz I can see myself in em.
6) If you was a tree & I was a Squirrel, I'd store my nuts in yer hole.
7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away.
8) Man - 'Fat Penguin!' Woman - 'WHAT?' Man - 'I just wanted to say something that would break the ice.'
9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.
10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went inta this cheap motel room.
11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.
12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon.
13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up.
(Eww.)
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Post by Jeannie Holmes on Jun 13, 2008 15:38:53 GMT -5
LMFAO! That's too funny, but what's really sad is that I've actually heard some of those lines in use.
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Post by slayercat on Jun 13, 2008 17:35:29 GMT -5
What a riot!! Especially #12!!!!! ;D
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Post by vampyre on Jun 15, 2008 15:32:57 GMT -5
Thanks for those. they should come in quite handy here in SE. GA. I liked the mirror in the pants one myself.
Fat Penguin is good to.
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Post by Raven on Jun 15, 2008 18:24:28 GMT -5
You'd only use those if a chick was hitting on you and you were trying to turn her away. I know you, Vamp. ;D
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Post by vampyre on Jun 15, 2008 22:18:28 GMT -5
First I would have to leave the house. You remember what happened last time.{shudder}
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Post by Raven on Jun 16, 2008 15:23:54 GMT -5
She was okay at first. Then you got to know her. And she turned stalker. Yeah, I remember. ;D
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Post by vampyre on Jun 17, 2008 19:10:21 GMT -5
..and was trying to get me to marry her before her divorce was final and all in just one week! I wonder wha would have happened if I knew about AXE back then?
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Post by Raven on Jan 28, 2009 9:52:46 GMT -5
Redneck Logic
Two rednecks, Jimbo and Bubba, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jimbo turns to Bubba and says, 'You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the Community College and sign up for some classes.'
Bubba thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day, Jimbo goes down to the college and meets Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, History, and Logic.
'Logic?' Jimbo says. 'What's that?' The dean says, 'I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?' 'Yeah.' 'Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I think that you would have a yard.'
'That's true, I do have a yard .' 'I'm not done,' the dean says. 'Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house.' 'Yes, I do have a house.' 'And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family.'
'Yes, I have a family.'
'I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife. And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual.'
'I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, You were able to find out all of that because I have a weed eater.' Excited to take the class now, Jimbo shakes the dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bubba at the bar.
He tells Bubba about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic.
'Logic?' Bubba says, 'What's that?'
Jimbo says, 'I'll give you an example. Do you have a weed eater?'
'No.'
'Then you're a queer.'
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